Far Away

Image Source [Here]

The concept of Christ, a man who lived so long ago, and so far away.  The son of God, who performed miracles and brought about our salvation as an undeserving gift.

It's always been hard for me to grasp.

The thought is emotionally and spiritually compatible, but logically difficult.  Not any more difficult than imagining the Pharaohs of Egypt, The Emperors of Rome, or my Great-great-great-great Grandparents.  It's not a question of existence, but of my own grasp on reality.

You see, it's not the immaculate conception, the miracles, or the resurrection I struggle with.  I've seen miracles in my own life.  I've witnessed healing, and blessings, and changes of the heart.  I can believe he existed, and that he still exists. It's the task of relating to and loving someone I can't remember.  When I would hear others bear their testimony of Jesus Christ, I'd watch the tears form in their eyes and ache to understand how they could relate to someone so personally when they'd never physically touched him, or looked into his eyes with theirs.

Someone who was so far away.

In 2013, I asked my husband for a priesthood blessing.  In that blessing I was instructed to build my personal relationship with Christ, and to prepare myself spiritually.  A few weeks later, I received another blessing with the same instructions.

I had hoped for an easy answer.  A blessing that brought solace, without an obligation.  But that's not always how the Lord works.  Confused, and reluctant to work, I began carefully seeking out opportunities to understand my Savior.

The process has been slow and ongoing, with sudden leaps of growth and long periods of stagnant quiet.  Recently, the promptings have been continuous without end.  An urgent push to expand my perspective and deepen my understanding.

I've felt an un-ending need to find Him.

Image Source [Here]

This blog isn't new.  It had 33 entries before today, filled with spiritual questions and the answers I had received.  But as my spiritual growth continues, I was craving a fresh start.

My Savior may seem far away, but slowly, I am learning that he is nearer than I might have ever known.